Oy. I’m spending the weekend following the Wedding Planner around Cape May.

Note that I said “The Wedding Planner” because Cape May really only has one true wedding planner and that’s Catherine Walton. Ms Walton does the traditional Jennifer Lopez movie kind of planning right down to the last detail.

Many of the larger reception venues have a bridal consultant on hand, but that person is more an events coordinator. Follow me and I’ll show you what I mean.

Catherine chose the weekend of May 20th for me to come along because it is the largest spring wedding weekend. Three or four beach weddings are planned for Friday, May 20th and 12 that we know of, are scheduled for Saturday May 21st.
“It’s the last weekend before the rates go up at the hotels, B&Bs and restaurants,” said Catherine, “And these are just couples who are actually getting married in Cape May. There could be more who are getting married elsewhere but holding their reception here in Cape May.”

So, let’s fast forward to Friday, May 20th.

I wake up at 5:50 a.m. in a panic. It’s raining for gawd’s sake. No, no, you don’t understand. This is rain as in the gods are fed up with mankind and are unleashing their vengeance kind of rain. (3-5 inches of rain ended up falling that day, plus gale force winds – that constitutes a coastal storm) Now, if I’m worried about this, imagine the panic the wedding planner is in?
There are three or four weddings scheduled for today, two were to be beach weddings. Catherine planned one of the weddings which was being held in St. Agnes Church, Cape May Point with a reception at the Chalfonte Hotel. However, the couple had planned for beach photos of the wedding party.

Catherine, her assistant Vanessa Rodkin, and I would be overseeing the rehearsal of two weddings. The first is to be a beach wedding Saturday morning at The Cove Pavilion with a reception at The Pelican Club. It is a wedding of about 85 people and Catherine will be providing Full Service consultation. In other words, she never leaves the bride’s side from early in the morning until the reception is over.The second wedding will be held at Congress Hall Beach Saturday afternoon with a reception following at Congress Hall Ballroom. It is a wedding of about 250 people. Catherine was brought in at the end of the planning stage. Catherine and Vanessa will only be overseeing the arrangements for the rehearsal today and the actual wedding ceremony tomorrow.

I am to meet Catherine and Vanessa at 4 p.m. As I walk in, Catherine has the television tuned to the weather channel and is on the phone with the mother of some bride assuring her that if she doesn’t feel she needs a wedding planner then by all means cancel the contract. The gist of it, as I can tell, is that the bride’s mother hired Catherine because they needed a venue for the wedding and once that had been secured, she wanted to weasel out of the contract. Catherine is very calm, very matter of fact, and very decisive. I’m nervous, in a panic and can’t decide if I should sit or stand.

Vanessa is very quiet and sitting patiently with a pink clipboard in her lap. Vanessa  decided in March on a career as a wedding planner. This is her first bridal season. Problem: Catherine has two nervous Nellie’s on her hands. Vanessa says she’s nervous but looks very calm and poised. I, on the other hand, look like the Wreck of the Hesperus and my curly hair is growing as we speak. I remove the copy of Martha Stewart’s Spring 2005 Wedding magazine from the chair and settle in to start with the nudging.

Dare I ask? Well, why not?

“Are we really going down to the beach for rehearsal?”

“The weather radar shows that the storm is moving out,” said Catherine. “The rain should be over and clear for tomorrow.”

She heard that the two beach weddings scheduled for today had to be moved to the lobbies of the hotels where the reception was held. And this is the risk of planning a beach wedding. Many people come to Cape May not because they have any emotional ties to the city but for the amenities it has to offer. Cape May can deliver one really romantic and memorable beach wedding. But – and this is a big but – there are risks. Actually there’s one risk – the weather – and you have to be prepared for that.

“But are we really going down to the beach for rehearsal?” I ask again.

“I’ll find out now.” She calls the mother of the bride. Thank Gawd. The bridal party is dressed for dinner, which will be held at A Ca Mia, and decided they don’t want to be outside in the wet sand. “We’re moving the rehearsal to Victoria Gardens at the Marquis de Lafayette Hotel,” Catherine says when she hangs up the phone. This is where most of the wedding party is staying and where the reception will be.

The Congress Hall wedding rehearsal party, however, have decided they want to rehearse on the beach and neither wind nor wet sand will stop them. So be it. Their wish is her, well our command.

Catherine and Vanessa go over the details of tomorrow’s weddings. It is Vanessa’s first solo flight. Catherine hands her a pink sheet of paper with the service itinerary to be clipped to the pink clip board. How cute is that? Catherine’s husband John, “the chairman” will set up the chairs on the beach. A beach ceremony is only allowed to take up to 30 minutes so timing is essential. Vanessa is responsible for making sure the guest book and bubbles, which will be provided by the Congress Hall wedding planner, are taken to the beach for the guests to sign. There will be 20 attendants. Vanessa is responsible for herding them in and getting the procession started. In addition to chairs, John will also put up white feather banners at the beginning of the ramp leading down to the beach and two more banners at the site of the wedding ceremony. This is, of course, after he sets up the chairs for the morning wedding – takes them down – and then sets them back up again for the afternoon wedding. Catherine calls the chairman and reminds him to bring in the box of shell party favors and place card holders. I don’t which wedding they’re for and I’m already getting a headache.

Of the 12 weddings which are taking place in Cape May tomorrow, Catherine Walton planned five, one of which is Full Service, plus the Congress Hall ceremony.

Meanwhile, Catherine’s service itinerary for the nuptials of Susan Harris and Dan Larsen reads like a military campaign. We will meet at 9:30 a.m. Leave Catherine’s shop by 9:45 a.m. Use the 15 minutes that we’re here to “put out any fires.” We need to collect 90 boxes of fudge for the party favors. Check the seating chart for the Pelican Club reception. Oops the wedding cake is here.
We run into the back kitchen and greet Karen Dalbora of Sugar Plum Bakery in Mays Landing. She’s wearing her rain slicker and the three cake layers are well protected. Gee – it doesn’t look like a wedding cake. Oh the phone’s ringing – someone needs a pair of white gloves for a tea party later this afternoon. Oh someone’s coming in the front door. The bride (not The bride, another bride) needs the marriage license. Now where were we?. Tomorrow’s schedule.

“The trolley will arrive at the Marquis de Lafayette Hotel at 10:15. The groomsmen will leave for the Cove Pavilion first – followed by the bridesmaids, the mother of the bride and the wedding planners. The wedding is at 11:30 a.m. So, sometime between 10:30 and 11 a.m. the horse-drawn carriage will take the bride and the father of the bride to the Cove.

“There’s a wedding about every hour at the Cove tomorrow,” said Catherine. “I already booked two weddings there for next year (the Saturday before Memorial Day weekend). Has everybody eaten because this will take us until 7 p.m. We need to be at Victoria Garden at 5:30 and at Congress Hall at 6:30. Where’s the rehearsal kit?”

She grabs a box which has a silk-flowered bouquet and a tiara. “It’s the bride’s torture kit,” she smiles.

And off we go.

And just as an aside – the wedding planner obviously doesn’t eat until after the planning is done.

A Full Service Wedding plan means this: The bride need not worry about a thing. Let the wedding planner worry about it. Here’s an example:
Problem: Catherine receives a call from a bride at 2 a.m. It was an afternoon wedding so the bridal party was out a little late. The bride brings her wedding dress into the hotel room and needs to hang it up. It’s too long to hang anywhere but on the arm of an old light fixture (with a bare bulb). The dress is in a garment bag and is five layers thick with silk, satin, lace and tulle. By the time the bride steps into the shower and walks out of the bathroom, the bulb has burned a hole through the back section of all five layers.

Solution: Catherine got up early the next morning and “just happen” to have the exact lace appliqué needed to repair the damage. Happy Ending.

Catherine has a bag which she calls her “bridal survival kit.” It has tampons, safety pins, needle and thread, lace, Kleenex, etc, etc. “I tell my brides, I don’t care what time it is, I want to know what the problem is so I can deal with it. Tell me,” she says as we walk into the Marquis de Lafayette Hotel and prepare for the rehearsal.

“Unfortunately, we can’t rehearse on the beach. They’ve (the bridal party) never done this before and at the end of the rehearsal, each person will know what they’re going to do.” In order to accomplish this, Catherine has to imagine what the stage setting will look like and recreate it inside the restaurant (which is closed at the moment).

The rehearsal goes a bit late. Because of the storm, some people are late arriving.  Did you know that the groomsmen, once they escort the guests up the aisle are not, according to tradition, supposed to walk up the center of the aisle again until the groom is married? That’s why you always see the groomsmen lined up behind the groom on the side of the altar or to the left of the officiator.

Anyway, all goes well and we’ll see the Harris-Larsen family tomorrow morning. Off to the rehearsal of Kimberly and Jeremy.

The very large wedding party schlepped en masse down to Congress Hall beach from Congress Hall – they too were very well attired for their rehearsal dinner – one very smart man brought a rubber pool-like thingy which he used for the smaller kids to grab onto so they could cross the road safely.

I gotta a tell ya, I bailed after the first ten minutes – I was tired, cold and hungry. The wedding planners, however, had donned extra clothing and were doing their thing as I left them.

The Wedding Day – I awake at 6 a.m. and can’t believe it. The sun is shining. It is a beautiful day. It’s as though yesterday never happened. It’s even warm. We arrive at the Marquis de Lafayette precisely on time. The groom is pacing nervously in the hotel lobby. His groomsmen (there are 14 attendants) are drifting down slowly and are ready to go. The first job of the wedding planner is to make sure the groom is “conscious.” Honey I didn’t even ask about those stories. But I can imagine. Any way this groom is all too conscious but looking good and ready to go.
We waste no time and immediately go up to the bride’s room. I feel so funny walking into this sanctuary – kind of like walking backstage and pestering the star while she’s in costume and make-up.

The flowers are on the bed – they have just arrived.

Susan, the bride, is in a chair and being attended to by non other than Emmy Award winning Celebrity Make-up Artist Marianne Skiba while her assistant attends to the maid of honor.

“Catherine,” says the bride, “the flowers are on the bed. I don’t know if the groomsmen’s boutonnières are there or not.”

Catherine immediately checks. They are.

“See,” the bride says to her maid of honor, “I don’t even have to worry about it. I just tell her and it’s done.”

Next, we go back down to the lobby to attach the boutonnières and to make sure the groomsmen and the groom and his family are in the trolley and off to the Cove.
The father of the bride is also nervously pacing back and forth. I asked him why Cape May.

 “Susan wanted a beach wedding and we started searching for places. A friend told us about Cape May. We live in Maryland. Did you know that Cape May is only third to Hawaii and Las Vegas for destination weddings? We came down a year ago and met with Catherine and here we are. And the sun is shining.”

Time – 10:40 a.m. The groomsmen and the bride groom’s family have left. The bridesmaids are assembled and ready to go. No bride. The father is sitting now talking with his wife.
“I promised Susan I wouldn’t make the wedding toast sound like a summation to the jury.”
He looks at me. “I’ve been told that the job of the father of the bride is to show up, pay up and shut up.”

Catherine has checked on the bride about two more times and is confident we’re approaching the zero hour. And there she is.

Radiant, beautiful and ready to say “I do.”

The rest of us get on board the trolley. There was a little confusion regarding where the photographer was. Turns out he was sitting in his car in front of the hotel. Catherine rounded him up and he was snapping away.

Down to the Cove we go. The trolley lets us off and circles to park alongside the Promenade. Problem: Someone has called the police about the trolley parking along Beach Ave. Catherine spots the police and immediately goes up to them.

“A new driver,” she said. “I told him to go to Second Ave., park, and wait for my signal.”

She moves onto the next mini problem. She instructs the groomsmen and bridesmaids about exactly what they are to do and when they are to do it. Every detail has been thought through and every question asked. And there were lots of questions. Most of the bridesmaids have decided to remove their shoes for the promenade down the imaginary aisle. Their very pretty heels are lined up along the of the Promenade. They look like something out of a fairy tail so dainty and abandoned.

From the time the bride arrives, until she and her father actually begin the walk, Catherine never leaves her side. She assists her from the carriage. She arranges the train. It is a bit windy and she rearranges the veil. And then rearranges it again. The bride kicks off her shoes – and the wedding procession begins.

The ceremony begins. Standing from the Cove Pavilion, the setting is picture perfect. The groomsmen lined up on one side. The bridesmaids on the other. And the sea, as though on cue, sends waves to shore with perfect white caps on their ends. Tourists are stand frozen on the Promenade watching as the groom kisses the bride.

Time to take pictures. Time to go to the reception.

There are more questions once the wedding party arrives at The Pelican Club. The DJ is about the announce them and to present for the first time Mr. and Mrs. Dan Larsen. Catherine supervises this stage direction at every interval.

And the wedding cake! When did it transform into a beautiful sea shell?

The father of the bride is making his toast.

Problem: The wedding planner’s phone rings in the middle of it. There is a problem with the Congress Hall wedding ceremony. It seems that too many wedding planners is similar to the problem of too many cooks spoiling the broth. The Congress Hall wedding planner does not handle anything outside of Congress Hall – meaning the wedding on the beach -hence the need to bring Catherine in. However, the Congress Hall consultant still coordinates all the other facets of the wedding. The bride wanted an arbor (the thing under which the couple exchange vows) . The florist was under the impression that Catherine was responsible for the arbor. No, said Catherine, that was to be the florist’s responsibility. An arbor was not in the contract and, in fact, is being used for the 4 p.m. beach wedding.

Solution: “If the florist doesn’t have an arbor, we can use the feathered banners.

It’ll be even more dramatic than an arbor. Is this our problem? No. But we still want to do what’s right to make the wedding happen.”

Next Problem: The bride wants to light candles on the beach after the ceremony but it’s not clear that the hurricane candleholders are all present and accounted for or that the windscreens Catherine has will fit the lamps. The hurricane lamps as well as the windscreens are both needed to keep the flames from blowing out. It’s windy you see, ‘cause we’re by the sea.

Solution: Vanessa must go to the bridegroom – NOT the bride – and tell him the problem and recommend that the candles be lit back at Congress Hall. Then Vanessa must go to the minister who will relay that information to the guests after the ceremony.

And there’s confusion about other small details as well. The first wedding went off like clockwork. At the reception the mother of the bride is thanking Catherine. The second wedding was absolutely beautiful, the bride just as radiant. But the second wedding was not smooth. The difference? One person to coordinate the entire event, therefore no misunderstandings. Two planners just might be two too many. The other difference? Experience.

Catherine Walton has been planning weddings for ten years. Even when she gave Vanessa her last minute instructions, including getting to the site an hour earlier than she had intended, she stressed attention to detail. “Measure twice, measure again, look at it, measure a third time and then cut.” Nothing can be left to chance.

People do come to Cape May sometimes only to have a beach wedding. They very often do not live near here and like the Harris-Larsen wedding they’ve only been to Cape May once before to look around. The next time they’re here is the day before the wedding. So you really need someone who’s going to look after your best interests and who knows the quirks of a small Victorian town. Also, after the consultation, if you find you really do not need a wedding planner but just want to know how to have a beach wedding – she’s more than happy to give you the rundown.

Me? Honey after the Congress Hall wedding, I’m exhausted. It’s 4:10 p.m. I don’t even wait for the wedding party to come back off the beach. I head straight up to the nearest bar for a cocktail.

Meanwhile, Catherine Walton had a another wedding to attend to.

Tips for planning your beach wedding in Cape May

• Rehearse, rehearse, rehearse. Preferably at the ceremony location. Don’t show up at your own wedding and encounter chaos.
• Assign someone you trust – not in the bridal party preferably – and give them total responsibility and authority to make the decision the day of the wedding to change the ceremony location in case of inclement weather. This person will tell you and the groom at the last minute possible where you are now going to be married if necessary.
• Do not under any circumstances watch the weather channel the week of the wedding. Let that designated person do it. Enjoy yourselves. The weather will be what it is. Make the best of it. It makes your wedding day story unique.
• Be on time. The day goes by so fast. Everyone is happier especially you if you have more time for those beach photos and more time at the reception. Be on time.
• Give the groom and the best man a roll of quarters for the parking meter.
• Bring a cooler to the beach filled with ice, small bottles of water and
  rolled/cold wash cloths (from the dollar store). Great for hot days, t he
  trolley, the ceremony and beach photos in the sun.
• Provide every guest a chair for the ceremony. Guests standing in clumps on the beach with no aisle for you to walk down looks very messy.
• Save unity candle services for the reception if possible. Do it
  during/after the blessing before dinner. Wind and strong breezes make it difficult often times on the beach.